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Wrote it in a super angry mood.....

I'm not dying because of you
To save you from some guilt
Which I know is anything but true
Breaking the castle of illusions that I built
I'm not opening these veins for you
Its me that I sought to revenge
Painting the red on my heart's blue
Forcing off this veil of pretense
I'm not silencing these beats for you my dear
Punishing myself one last time
For leaving me with loneliness and fear
And taking away all that was mine

Imitate

Let's all imitate
What's wrong in believing
Everything around you is just for you
You lent it to the world
To follow the script
The script of the REAL almighty
Let's pretend
Yay!!!! world let's go
Bring out your best disguise
Let's laugh till it becomes real
Let's cry till we get the right reason
Enjoy the foulness of our soul's hollowness
Let's pretend to know
The meaning we keep talking about
Smother your lips with the asses
Asses we pretend to live for
Let's live it through
The pretension without suspicion
Let's enjoy the laughter
Till we know its ourselves
We are winking at

JUST A SONG

sometimes when you want to do the one thing that you love the most and you can't do it , you go insane.....this poem is about a person who wants to listen to his favorite song.......

Just a song is what I wish for

Some peace to let us alone

Just me and my beloved song

I come back everyday

To the life lived no other way

I like the sound of others around me

Life sprouting up and life aging away

But not as much as my song

Long forgotten in the voices that I hear all the time

Angry cookers and scheming wives

I tried you know

Tried the all time favorite

Finding peace in the obvious sounds

Sounds of life around me

Brimming with innocence, joy

And the revenge of normalcy

Left no corner unheard

Waiting for some privacy

For me and my beloved song

But they disagreed

The ones making music around me

Found vulgarity in my wish

Then one day it was the turn of the day

To turn into the chosen one

The day I would say no

The day I would light the match

Set fire to my burning desire

Let the song fondle me

Lick me with the tune

Devour me with the beats

Moving Up and down

Through my spine

Playing with me on the dusty tape recorder

Making love to me in the silence

The silence of my burnt down house

For a moment I felt at home

With me and my calmed down soul

Till the sirens interrupted

Bringing what I knew was coming

 Feeling like the joyous groom

The groom of a black widow spider

 

RAW

Sometimes I rub them when they’re raw

Sometimes when they are wounds

Sometimes when they are feelings

Sometimes when they are noises

Sometimes when they are thoughts

Sometimes when they are people

Sometimes when its love

Sometimes when they are charcoal sketches

Sometimes when they are nerves

Sometimes when they are boiling hot

Sometimes when they are memories

Sometimes when they are goodbyes

Sometimes when they are too raw to chew

Too raw to pass through

CALM

Question

Its good to be the question
In a world full of obsession
Why be the answer
When you don't know your cancer
You try every lane
But miss every train
You want it the most
Need it the least
Yet every transition
Leaves you in confusion
Not fit to be here
Yet a misfit in that somewhere
Lived most of it searching
And found comfort in not answering